To pierce or not to pierce...

...it's not really a question just a choice I never really thought about before. By the way this is about ear piercing, specifically that of little girls.
My mom was not the ear piercing type so I didn't have mine done until I was 10 or so when my sister and I asked if we could do it. Mine eventually closed up and I did them again when I was 19 or 20. In Egypt the little girls have their ears pierced soon after birth in the hospital. It's the Egyptian (maybe Arab) way of differentiating between girls and boys. Here, in the US we use clothes; pink or blue. In Egypt there is problem with boys wearing pink. In fact, a shoe salesman tried to sell us shoes with pink lines and hearts on them for Karim and was confused when we told him boys in the US don't wear pink or hearts.
Anyway, Roqaya has been eyeing my earrings for a while and asking about them and why Baba doesn't have any. I told her earrings are for ladies and girls. She thought about this for a little and asked where her earrings were. So we told her when she's a little bigger she can get earrings. When she was coming up on her 3rd birthday she was asking almost everyday so hubby told her maybe when she was 3 she could get some.
Well, she turned 3 on Friday and on Saturday we went to the mall to get her earrings. I told her it was going to hurt a little and asked if she wanted to do it and she said, yes she wanted her earrings (like it didn't matter what she would have to endure). She sat in the chair bravely knowing the people messing with her ears were going to hurt her. She flinched a little when the guns went in but she didn't cry, just held a sad face for a minute or so. But once she was able to see herself in the mirror, she was all smiles and said she was happy even though it hurt a little. She looked at herself for a long time in the mirror and was so proud of herself. For one, she was a big girl now, but mostly she seemed happy to complete her girlness. She now is a 3 year old with long hair, pink dresses, and sparkly earrings--all of which fulfill her idea of what constitutes a girl.
So, for anyone thinking of piercing their little baby girl's ears, I say wait and let her ask, it's so much more than just having extra accessories.

Why Homeschool

Some people think of home-schooling as a negative thing. Some may even think that a family who chooses to home-school could be guilty of neglect. Though this could be true in some cases, a family with a sincere devotion to home-schooling--one could argue--is doing more for their child/ren than public (or even private or charter) school can offer. I don't mean to say that home-schooling is necessarily better than traditional schooling. I went to public school and am fine. But, in my case I feel like the best choice for our family is to home-school.

We looked into public school but found it's not a good fit for us and I would not feel comfortable sending my kids. The school system in our area has been having problems for a while, like many public schools, due to federal and state regulations. In one report I heard, teachers were caught helping students cheat on standardized tests to get better overall scores which leads to better funding for the school. I feel like the focus has shifted and the students and teachers are caught in the middle. At our nearest elementary school some classes were cancelled (I'm guessing due to funding) and the students had to be transfered to another elementary school along with all the students who were already attending that school. The school is not that big so I can only imagine the issues they are having with class size. 

We looked into private schools in our area after deciding public school wouldn't work for us. Unfortunately, the ones in our area are either way too expensive or just not up to the standard we would like for the money we would be paying. 

I have several friends who home-school and have had the opportunity to observe them and their kids over the last few years. One thing I've realized and come to really love about home-schooling is that formal home-schooling is really just an extension of what we're already doing at home. It is at home that I'm teaching my kids motor skills, cognitive skills, social skills, etc. Why not continue with academic skills? Sure, there will be times when I run into a subject that will be difficult to teach (like math). But these are the times to use my resources. I can either get my husband to do math lessons after dinner, utilize the many online resources for learning math, or call on my friend who has a PhD in math to teach my kids advanced math while I teach her kids about the fundamentals of psychology or how to play volleyball. 

I love the one-on-one interaction home-schooling provides. That way if my kids struggle in a subject we have the freedom to slow down and keep doing it until they get it. This is something I wish I had while in school. Math is something that really gives me a hard time and I think a lot of the reason is that I got a little confused somewhere in elementary school but since I was part of a bigger class the teacher kept going. So I started middle school still a little confused. I was able to make it through but not with a full understanding of what I was doing. I also love that we can spend extra time on a subject that the kids really enjoy. 

I also really enjoy the ability to take school anywhere. Last week some friends and I got the kids together and went to the zoo. One of my friends is home-schooling her 1st grader and as part of his science work he brought a notebook and filled out a table of habitats and listed which animals belong to which habitats. When reporting school time, she is able to use our fun time at the zoo as science time, PE time, writing, and spelling time. I also like how this encourages kids to learn everywhere, not just in the classroom. 

Some people claim that home-schoolers don't get the same opportunities to socialize as kids in traditional schools. But, I would argue they can get equal or better socialization. Home-schooling is much more time efficient which leaves more time in the day for playing with friends or other extracurricular activities. 

There are many more reasons why I am happy to have the option to home-school and why I feel it's the best fit for our family. For anyone interested in more on home-schooling I would recommend this book

Good Advice

Like most  moms, I worry if I'm doing right by my kids. Sometimes I wonder if I'm totally messing up. A while back I found myself getting more frustrated and questioning myself more than usual and at the very worst of it I received two simple lines of advice that were totally unsolicited and not really even meant as advice toward me, just women talking, but I soaked them in.
At one of our weekly get-togethers some moms were talking about our kids' and the reactions of some people. Like when a kid is acting up in public and then someone says, "oh, you need to train your kid better", or something like that. At this same time I was really battling with Karim and his sometimes-undesirable behavior at home and outside. Karim is awesome. He also has A LOT of energy, curiosity, and excitement. He likes to be the center of attention and is not a fan of sitting for more than a few minutes at a time. These traits are not always easy for me to deal with.
So back to the advice. My friend was talking about her son acting up at a restaurant and a stranger coming and telling her she's not doing a good job with her son, who is 1 (this also happened to us on a an airplane that was stalled on the runway for over an hour when Karim was not yet 2 and a man with no kids tried to give us parenting advice). So another friend said, "you know, everything about our kids comes from God, their temperament, personality,etc. and as moms we're all doing our best to teach them".  I really took this in and thought, "Karim is who he is, not because of something I did or didn't do but because God made him that way, and as long as I'm teaching with patience and mercy the learning will come soon enough".
The second piece of advice came from another friend when we were talking about taking care of the house with tornado-like kids living in it. Anyone with young kids knows what I'm talking about. While cleaning one room, another one is being destroyed. A friend from high school put it well here. While discussing the impossible job of having a clean house when young kids are living in it my friend told us about advice her mother (who raised 4 kids) gave her: "lower your standards, lower your standards, lower your standards". Really, what's more important, having a super clean house, or having a sort-of clean house and having fun with the kids?

Funny Girl

It's always fun to see how the kids do things differently, how each of them have distinct personalities and interests. Roqaya is always surprising us with the silly things she does. Since she could talk she's been all about the color pink. Those of you who know me well know I'm not super girly or anything so Roqaya's fascination of all things Girl is all her own choosing. She loves anything that is pink or sparkles.
At the library yesterday she decided she was going to pick all the books. Karim usually does this with me, but he was busy playing so she jumped right in. Here were her selections

We read a couple of these last night, and although they are cute, the stories are not very good. I probably should have picked up a couple back-up books, but the kids are happy so it's ok.

Roqaya also has some habits that are so far off from what Karim does/did, as well as what most people do. We did the "Peanut Butter and Jelly" song at the library some months ago and the kids really got into pbj's after that. I've never seen anyone each a sandwich in any other way than the "normal" way, until Roqaya started eating sandwiches, and almost anything layered. 

She separates the sandwich, then scrapes off the top layer with all the goodness with her teeth and then she's done. I've seen her do it with bagels and one time only, in the car, with a twix candy bar. I knew the chocolate would be a mess either way, but this was bad and we will never do layered candy bars in the car anymore.

**for the Egyptian aunties--I thought you would enjoy seeing Karim having a little Egyptian soda party here in MD :)

The Bad Man and the Happy People

A few weeks ago we did a lesson with the kids about Moses and the Pharaoh. How the Pharaoh was a bad man and very mean and that God helped Moses and the Israelites escape through the Red Sea. We've been following the events in Egypt since the protests began last month but haven't really involved the kids much with so much going on each day. But, yesterday that all changed when the Egyptians finally got what they were praying for. Last night we went over a few videos and pictures, showing the kids what the people in Egypt were doing. I told Karim the story of the Bad Man and the happy people of Egypt. We showed him these videos (the first one has English subtitles, but not the second which is the Egyptian National Anthem--correction: it's not the national anthem, it just contains the chorus line (ya belady, ya belady, ana behebak ya belady), the main words being "oh my country, I love you". Some of the images show some of the people who died during the protests)

then talked about why the people were so happy and what the Bad Man did to the people he was supposed to be helping, how he hurt Karim's aunts and uncles and cousins. Then he asked to see who the Bad Man is. We showed him a video of Mubarak giving his final, pathetic speech and out of no where the kids start yelling "get out! shoo! we don't want you!". I was surprised because I had not voiced my opinions out loud, just in type. It must be the Egyptian blood running in their veins. 

Since we couldn't be with our Egyptian family yesterday we did a little celebration for the kids and ourselves. We took them to pray in the masjid and then let them pick what food they wanted. Karim voted for a hamburger from McDonald's, not what I wanted him to say, but they both got their happy meals and were happy. We came home and hung out together and had some chocolate cake the kids helped me make the other day. With all the excitement we didn't sleep until around midnight and I'm really tired this morning, but it was "once in a lifetime" day yesterday so I can't complain. والحمد لله رب العالمين 

Growing and Changing

It's been a while since I last blogged so I will just try to fit in everything we've been doing the last few months.
The biggest change is that I started teaching Karim how to read. I put in tons of research time on homeschooling and finally have at least a tentative plan of what I want to do. For now our focus is on reading English and Arabic and then we'll go from there once we have to prepare for formal schooling. Karim was born 3 days before the Maryland cut-off date so he's always going to be a year behind his buddies, but really that is ok with me, especially considering his active personality--putting off sitting in a desk is better for all of us. So we've been working through The Ordinary Parent's Guide to Teaching Reading and so far it's been great. We started with short vowels and now we're almost done with the consonants, next we will start putting consonants and short vowels together to read small words. Then we move on to long vowels and common letter combinations, at which point Karim should be able to read simple books. He has picked up a few tricks for reading already. One of his favorite things is reading books and he seems to do well at memorizing words from these books that we read a lot as well as common words he sees around outside. He stores all these words and when he sees them elsewhere he "reads" them (but really he has just memorized what they look like).
We ordered him some Arabic language activity books to work on letter recognition and he watches YouTube videos to practice pronunciation and vocabulary. I was finally able to find an Arabic teacher book with English teacher notes, so we ordered that and will start it next week along with the activity work books. We're having a really good time and I have enjoyed teaching him and look forward to more with Karim and Roqaya when she's ready, although she is still getting a lot out of Karim's lessons.
It's been getting colder so we've been staying home more often. It's not easy finding indoor things to do that don't cost a lot of money. We have 2 weekly activities we do that work well--the Toddler group and the story time at the library, at what time we also do our weekly library check-outs which seem to be growing. Each time I leave the library I have more books than I returned. There are just so many good ones and I'm pretty sure the kids put some in the bag when I'm not looking.
We've been playing Wii fit and Wii sports to keep somewhat active at home (right now Karim is biking and I'm able to have a little time to myself). Karim (and sometimes Roqaya) has started helping out more with chores. Karim loves to vacuum and put laundry away and I recently started using a timer to motivate him to clean-up toys. I came across the idea in a book and wasn't sure if it would work, but the timer works for getting him to do just about anything--cleaning, getting dressed, getting ready for bed--things that shouldn't take long but do for some reason.
That's where we are and I will try to update more often

Go Fish

I recently picked up a pack of Go Fish cards for Karim and we've had a great time playing when we get some alone time during Roqaya's nap or when she is busy playing with her toys. I think it gave hubby and I inspiration to eat more fish. With hubby growing up on the shore of the Mediterranean and on the Nile delta he is familiar with many fish dishes. I grew up in Colorado so am familiar mainly with native lake and river fish. We found a nice little fish market and have been experimenting with different fish and recipes. We normally keep a supply of frozen Tilapia fillets in the freezer. When I was in Egypt we ate fresh, whole Tilapia (Bolti) several times and I really enjoyed it. So, we picked up a few Tilapia and had them cleaned there (cleaning a fish is something I'm not sure I'm ready for). We marinated them in butter and garlic and hubby made a nice stuffing of green peppers, onions, and lemon. They turned out really well and were very tasty. Last night we tried a different fish, a White Bass and changed up the recipe a little, using less lemon and adding a Serrano pepper.
I got pretty good at de-boning fish in Egypt but seem to have lost the skill. It takes me a while to get all the meat out, but on both nights, it was worth it.

This was the Tilapia with rice and salad

Eid Al-Fitr

We celebrated Eid this year on Sept. 10th and since that was a Friday we were able to extend the fun over the whole weekend! We started the week before with a few gifts for the kids to get them excited since this is the first year that Karim really understands what a holiday is. They both love painting and coloring (mostly on the walls) so we thought an art easel was a good idea. They really love it and so far we haven't had any major messes, although it would be nice if I had a separate art room because for now I have to keep it in the kitchen. It works out well though because they can do that while I'm cleaning the kitchen or cooking dinner.

Then on Thursday night Karim got the surprise of his life--a new bike! And, a big boy bike at that. He was so excited, and so was Roqaya, but she was a little jealous too even though she just got her new bike a few weeks before.

Karim was nice and let her have a turn though.

We got up early on Friday and got dressed in our new clothes and headed to the masjid.

After we prayed and had our breakfast (including our first cup of coffee since before Ramadan) we broke out the bikes to take them for a spin outside. Karim did really well and figure out the new bike right away. The brakes were a new feature and he was confused at first because he couldn't ride backward like on his trike. Roqaya mostly just walked around in her new helmet calling it a hat. And then she headed to her best friend, the swing.

The helmet on the swing turned out the be a good thing because she fell off right after I took this picture.
We went to see our friends for lunch and then headed home, all of us ready for bed by 8:00
We had made plans to do something on Saturday but we all woke up in the mood to relax. So we stayed home and just rode the bikes around the block and got ourselves ready for Sunday at Six Flags.
We had a really good time, I think I had more fun on the kid rides than I would have on the adult rides. I'm not really a thrill seeker so the spinning tube ride was about my limit.

So the Sky Coaster was definitely off limits for me.

We rode the carousel a lot and a variety of kid rides that are basically the same just with different characters to ride in--they all pretty much just go in a circle, something I'm not really fond of.

 Karim was not happy that his side of the plane didn't have a steering wheel. The line was small though so they were able to ride again and switch places, then everyone was happy.

At this point it was raining pretty steadily and the kids' clothes were soaked but we kept going and having fun. We took a little break on the train and then the rain stopped and the rest of the day was very pleasant. 

Roqaya fell asleep on the way to Thomas Town but woke up after a quick power nap and only missed one ride.

We headed back to the other side of the park with more kiddie rides to finish off the day. 

We rode the carousel one more time, ran into some friends on the way out and had a nice chat, then headed home. The kids both crashed right away in the car.

It was a great weekend!

Roqaya

Somehow 2 years has gone by since Roqaya joined our family. We didn't really do anything for her birthday since it fell on the second day of Ramadan. She did get a cake and Tayta and Geddo sent her a new bike. She got one just like Karim's but her's is pink. She really loves it and she is learning much quicker than Karim did since she has him to teach her. We practiced inside a few times and then took it for a spin outside. She did pretty well for her first time. She was able to pedal right away (it took Karim a while before he figured that out) but, like Karim, she doesn't understand the concept of steering yet. She didn't get very far because she kept running into the grass and getting stuck, but she had a great time.

At her 2 year check-up at the doctor everything went well and she is in the 95th %ile for height and weight--not too surprising.  Her hair is growing very nicely and I'm able to do more with it although most days we stick to the good ol' pony tail or pig tails because she's not very patient with anything that takes longer than 1 minute. But at least she doesn't pull her barrettes out anymore.

He number 1 favorite thing to do is whatever Karim is doing which is both good and bad as she learns a lot of good things from him, but she also learns the naughty things he does. The good thing is that she listens to me much better than Karim did at that age. Her best talent has to be in throwing a good fit. Something new to me as Karim was never a fit-thrower.  When she gets really mad about something there is no mistaking it. She's been practicing since she was about 6 months old so she's got it down now. I just hope this is one behavior she grows out of soon.


In true 2-year-old fashion she got herself stuck between the banister railings and it took me a while to figure out how to get her out. We were both happy to get her out and I was happy that I didn't have to break the railing. She hugged me for several minutes afterward. Before I got her out though, I made sure to snap a quick picture :)

Siblings

Sometimes I think about what life would be like if we had only Karim or just Roqaya. The responsibility of raising kids grows exponentially because it's not just the difficulty of having two kids, but also the combination of them together. This is especially true in Roqaya's case because she learns so much from Karim that she would have never gotten from Ahmed and I. I remember when Karim was younger and I would give him toys to play with but he wouldn't really know how to play with them so he lost interest. But, now Roqaya has her brother to show her how things work and how to have fun. He also shows her lots of naughty stuff which adds to the difficulty for me but in some way is beneficial to them. He teaches her what kinds of food are good, how to go the bathroom like a big kid (although she's a little confused about the standing up part), how to "swim" in the bathtub, how to climb in and out of the crib, how to ride a trike, how to eat with utensils, how to hold hands when crossing the street, what cartoons are worth watching, how to color on the walls (my least favorite), and how to make funny faces in the window. Perhaps less noticeable though are the things Roqaya teaches Karim. She has taught him how to be patient with those younger and less understanding than he is, how to be gentle, how to share, how to play cooperatively, and how to take turns.
I'm so glad they have each other and hope they continue to learn from and enjoy each other.

School, again

Since my last post about school, we did some research and found that Karim's birthday is after the state cutoff of September 1st, so for this year we have no option but to put off any formal class room activities. Then today I read an interesting article focusing on child development and education. After reading this I am leaning more toward just relaxing about school and allowing Karim to learn through our daily activities without forcing any major structure on him. I have tried some academic activities before like tracing letters and numbers and other preschool workbook activities and he has never really responded to them, in fact, he was rather resistant. I was worried that I was doing something wrong and that he was missing something and feared he would fall behind when it was time to officially start school. However, after reading the article and reviewing what I've learned about child development I think it's more important to allow learning to happen naturally at this point depending on what Karim is interested in. For example, he loves letters, words, 'reading', and books although I've never really sat him down and taught him directly, it's just something he likes and chooses to explore.
The article is a good read for anyone with preschool/kindergarten aged kids who are struggling with making a decision as it really helped put my mind at ease.
On another note, I know I haven't put up pictures recently and I've been really bad about even taking pictures of the kids. Here are a few of Karim being a goof. He found his tux from my bro and sis-in-law's wedding and decided he wanted to wear it. They just celebrated their 2nd anniversary so we were barely able to get the tux on, but Karim thought it was a lot of fun. He kept saying, "look mom, I'm a father, I'm going to work now"

Roqaya was indifferent to the whole thing...

You will notice though, she is in my patented (not sure if that's true or if other parent's have used this technique) backward pjs. She has recently been insisting to not wear clothes. This would not be such a big deal if she also did not enjoy peeing on herself and then running around laughing at how cool she is. I have also found one piece leotards to be helpful and not so hot especially once she figured out how to unsnap her onsies. It's a constant battle but so far I'm winning. I'm just glad she has the sense to remain clothed in public.

Learning to Swim

We signed up Karim for swimming lessons in July. He is so ready for his classes to start, he's been a water lover since I can remember. He loves "swimming" in the bathtub, really he just dunks himself and slides around on the bottom of the tub. We went to our community pool this weekend to get him used to swimming in a pool. He had not been to a real pool before--he's had plenty of experience with their kiddie pool, the ocean, some rivers and water parks, but never just a pool. He was scared for about 2 seconds but once he was in that was it. We got the kids float suits last year which work really well and they like them. This way Karim could pretty much be on his own since the shallow end is 3 feet and he couldn't touch. After about 10 minutes of swimming he decided he wanted to get out and jump in from the steps. He did that a couple times and then decided it would be more fun to jump from the edge of the pool. It was all over after that, then he worked on jumping as big as he could. He didn't mind one bit being submerged in the water. I'm not sure how well he'll adjust once he's not in his float suit though, but that's why we want him to take the lessons--to be familiar of the water and not be scared.
Roqaya seemed to feed off Karim and was soon pushing my hands away and wanted to go off by herself. She wasn't as good at staying vertical so I still had to stay right next to her in case she tipped over. I was surprised when she started climbing out and jumping from the edge of the pool. I had to catch her though because she hasn't quite figured out that she needs to close he nose and mouth when going under the water. I think I was most surprised when Karim said he had to go to the bathroom. I assumed he would just go, but he insisted on getting out and going in the locker room, he found it unfathomable that kids would pee in the pool.
I was unable to get pictures since it was hard enough keeping track of the two kiddos. I'll try to get some when he starts his lessons since Roqaya and I will be in the bleachers watching.

It is official....

Roqaya is a big girl! She is done nursing. We've been working on this for a couple weeks now and yesterday was her first full day without "mama's milk" (the code name we use, and two words I have been very sure not to say in case she thinks its her invitation). She sometimes gets really angry when she doesn't get to nurse, but I've learned to catch her before she gets too tired and I give her her singing puppy and rock her until she falls asleep. Last night was her first night without her night cap and she did really well with just one little whining spell before dozing off.
I had such an easy time weaning Karim, he basically did it himself and there was no effort involved. But with Roqaya, she was a frequent nurser so I had to get her down from about 10 sessions a day. I just hope that she soon forgets all about mama's milk so we can have an easier time getting her to sleep, especially at night. Either way, she's now a big girl, but still my baby.

Day Five

This was probably our most leisurely day since we didn't have any major plans, we just hung out in Cairo. We visited the railroad museum inside the train station and we saw a lot of cool stuff.

The King's train

Karim driving the King's train

Model of how ancient Egyptians moved large items. Basically a bunch of people pulled the large stones on big sleds.

Then we made out way to the Cairo tower where we had lunch in the rotating restaurant on top. This is something we had to do because it's something we could never afford in the US.

The bottom floor lobby

Outside the tower on our walk to the main road we found this tree, I don't know what it was but I really like it

We found a cab on the main road and asked him to take us somewhere to get American coffee on the way to the train station. We ended up driving for hours, asking people on the street to point us to a Starbucks but we kept being told "it's right down this street" or "yes, right around this corner" but it was never there. We finally happened upon another coffee place after we'd given up and were going back to the train station. We ordered a third cup for our cab driver who had never had American coffee. That was the only cup of coffee I had in the whole 3 months I was in Egypt and it was fantastic. We stopped at a mango juice stand outside the train station and then got situated in our seats for the quick ride back to Alexandria.